Introduction

Christmas means different things to different people. For some it’s about gathering with loved ones, be they family or friends, and creating memories. For others it’s about that and Jesus.

For me, as a child, and perhaps like most children, Christmas was about neither of those things but instead two other things: gifts and food. And I think, as an unemployed citizen at the time, this makes sense. After all, Christmas was the one time of the year that it seemed as though all of my dreams might possibly come true, and that I might receive some material validation that I was a valued member of my family. 

Me looking devious as per usual with my partner in crime, Moyna. Photo by our dad.

I remember at some point, maybe following my 7th or 8th birthday, my parents decided that they were going to stop celebrating me and my siblings birthdays as separate days since many of us were born in the same month, or the months were really close together. Between my siblings and parents our birthdays cover January, April, May, July, September, October, and November (unfortunately there are no Capricorns, Cancers, Geminis, or Virgos in my nuclear family).

So my parents would pick a day when the family would celebrate the October girls, the November boys, and so forth. This also meant that we’d get fewer gifts, which was my childhood nightmare. As gifts had somehow been established in my brain as a symbol of my worth. So Christmas became the time of year for higher gift expectations. This meant that organization and strategy would need to be employed, and thus a Christmas List needed to be created.

Thee Christmas List to be precise. 

Not to be mistaken for a “wish list”, which implied wishful thinking and lack of agency over my wants and fate. The Christmas List was an annual tradition among my siblings and I.

Pre-easy to access internet.

Pre-tumblr.

Pre-anything tech.

The Christmas list was, what some might call, an intentional spell of sorts put forth into the ethers via Sears, Target, Macy’s, American Girl, Toys’R’Us and many other catalogs. The Christmas List was composed of clippings from these catalogs which we’d beg our Dad to bring home from the mall, order in the mail, or fight over from the Sunday paper. The clippings would go onto construction paper with white glue, and your name.

Putting your name on the list was crucial, not for Santa’s identification, but for Dad. After all, Santa did not exist in our house. My parents never had us believe in Santa, because:

1) He was a false god of sorts,

but most importantly

2) My parents wanted to stress that someone was buying us our gifts, and they made sure we knew it wasn’t some old white guy breaking into our apartment with “good will”.

A plate of collards, sage sausage stuffing, cranberry sauce, brown sugar ham, and roasted chicken. Missing are “parker house” rolls and gravy.

So instead of hoping and wishing for gifts, a Christmas list was expected of and was something I thoroughly enjoyed piecing together. Although putting together a Christmas list with items from huge companies certainly fed into capitalism, it was, as mentioned, my first exposure into setting intentions and hoping for an abundant outcome regardless of the current circumstances.

However, somewhere along the way, perhaps in the process of becoming an adult at a very young age, I started to scale back on my asks and center practicality over wishful thinking. I’d ask for what I want, but really only for 25% of what I thought was possible in that want. The thought process being that I was somehow doing the universe, or my friends, a favor by making the ask easier for them to fulfill.

When instead, as one friend has recently (frequently) begun to remind me (not in these exact words but),

“Ask for more than you think is possible and allow people the chance to step up to it or turn you down.”

It’s the last part that scares me the most, but what’s 2020 if not a year to face your greatest fears. Anticipating an abundant outcome and being open to disappointment.

So, in honor of abundantly thinking baby Maya who so willingly put herself out there every year with ridiculous wish lists, I wanted to share an abundant spread of some of her favorite holiday foods. Holiday foods that can be a source of fuel to keep going when life feels uncertain, and you need energy to make all those possibilities you're imagining come to fruition. A spread that demands you take seconds at the very least.

An almost complete spread of what my childhood table looked like growing up: tangy collards, moist and crispy sage sausage stuffing, cranberry sauce, brown sugar ham, and roasted chicken. Missing are “parker house” rolls and gravy.

My mom, sisters, and I would spend days getting this holiday spread of ham, roast chicken, greens, rolls, cornbread stuffing, gravy, and more together, and I remember thoroughly enjoying the weeks leading up to Christmas with all the cooking prep and this promise of a full table. So if you attempt to make any or all of these dishes, I say start now if you have the means to, and give yourself the gift of time so you can enjoy the process of preparing and eating it.

Table of Festivities:

Introduction: Above

Chapter 1: Home-cured Apple Glazed Ham

Chapter 2: Smoky Collard Greens

Chapter 3: Cornbread (and Stuffing, call it what you will)

Chapter 4: Super Basic Cranberry Sauce

Chapter 5: The Only Oatmeal Cookie Recipe I Use

Chapter 6: Mary Loveann’s Sweet Potato Pie

Chapter 7: SunButter Cookies

Want to get me something for the holidays?

All I want for Christmas is to get this curriculum development project fully funded, Support Deep Routes and support BIPOC educators, artists & web developers!